Thief of Joy

Recently I was able to meet a fellow local blogger, Marie with Better With Cayenne, for some drinks! Let me throw out there that asking (basically) a total stranger to meet and connecting to network is COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone. I was so nervous and anxious to meet her because her Instagram and blog looked so successful and she seemed to have it all together and figured out. When I reached out I was so surprised that she was not only willing but welcoming to the idea of meeting me!

Side note we decided on Squibb to meet at. If you haven’t been there yet, go!  It is literally the best place to meet up as it serves coffee AND wine. Can you get any better than that?!

As we started talking and finding similiarities I found that as new bloggers we had more in common than I thought. We began chatting about our social media and tips and tricks we use etc. But, when we started talking about other bloggers that we follow we both came to a quick realization that we absolutely compared ourselves to them. Now, comparison isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but, when you do it to put yourself down and your success down that is when you should take a step back and re-evaluate.

It was so eye opening to learn that I wasn’t the only one who compared herself to other bloggers with 700, 5,000 or even 15,000 followers on Instagram or more. We both over thought which hashtags to use or analyzing what times to post and contemplated “how do these ladies get their Instagram to follow a freaking color pallet!?” lol. I do envy you bloggers with that much self control lol. I started tell Marie that I get so upset with myself and try and try and try to understand what I’m doing or not doing to not get the following I compare myself to.

She reminded me to not look at it that way. She told me to look at it as to see the people I do have and that the audience I have now is the audience I want and that would attract more people I relate to. She also reminded me that these Instagram accounts and blog following comes with time haha. As you can tell patience is not my strong suit. It’s always good to have a voice of reason sometimes to pull you out of your storm cloud.

Marie and I also talked about the balance of everything and asked ourselves how do these bloggers do it?! She and I both have full time jobs (in case ya didn’t know), stick to an active workout routine, we are both in relationships, do all of the random errands that everyone does (grocery shop/make dinner/clean/etc), attempt to have a social life, have some sort of relaxation somewhere in there and, while doing all of those things, blog and write for all of you awesome people!

Don’t get me wrong, and I’m sure I can speak for the both of us, we LOVE to do this or else we wouldn’t make sure to take the time to share with all of you. The thing that I need to keep in mind is that I am not the blogger with 10,000 followers..and I can’t be that person right now. YET. They are so blessed to be able to do that as a full time job. One day I may be there, with your amazing help that is! But, until then I need to make sure I take care of you- the people I get to talk to now!

Good vibes attract your tribe…right? lol

Until then, I need to do me. I need to do what I can do. Not compare myself to the extent of self destruction but to remind myself that I am doing the best that I can. I feel like the craziest part of this is that after meeting with Marie from Better with Cayenne I went through my blog post ideas journal entries from last September when I started blogging. One of my blog post title ideas I wrote down was “Comparison is the thief of joy” . it is so crazy how the world brings people into your life. 

Bottom line, I want to give all of you the best content I can give you! Everything I write, I put me into it.

It’s ok to compare but love yourself and what you have accomplished!